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When you are trying to figure out how to declutter your home, the biggest challenge often goes beyond the mechanics of it. You could have a great plan in place, and you could excel at the cleaning and organizing aspects of it. But the biggest challenge can be knowing what to get rid of and what to keep.

If you are trying to figure out how to declutter and get rid of stuff, you will find a lot of different methods and advice out there. Here are some common suggestions for how to know what to get rid of when decluttering:

• Try getting rid of one item a day.
• Make the “easy” choices before the hard ones.
• Don’t keep things because you will feel guilty about getting rid of them (i.e. unwanted gifts).
• Don’t cling to sentimentality.
• Get rid of things you haven’t used in X amount of time.
• If you have X number of a certain type of item, it is time to whittle down the collection.
• Children should be encouraged to get rid of toys they have outgrown.

Out of all of this advice, there are only a couple of suggestions I think make sense. Making the “easy” choices first is a great idea, and you really don’t need to keep things because you would feel guilty passing them on. If you don’t use something ever, maybe it would be better to give it to someone who would.

But the rest? Many of these suggestions are pretty arbitrary, and they will probably lead to regrets. By all means, make the “easy” choices. But you don’t have to make the hard ones. If you really feel a pull to hold onto something, do it. If you feel sentimental about an object, that isn’t something to shun. That object has been imbued with special meaning. It is there to remind you of a person, place, or time that you loved. There is also no reason to set a “quota” on how many items you get rid of or own, nor is there a reason to enforce that quota on your children.

I would suggest instead a simpler approach. If you truly love an object, or if a family member truly loves it, keep it and treasure it. Stuff is only “stuff” if we treat it that way. And if there is stuff you treat as “stuff,” then donate it. Someone else somewhere may treasure it and love it. Not only is it taking up space in your home, but someone else needs it.

What’s the number one weapon in your decluttering arsenal? Stop the constant influx of new items. Decide to buy less. Skip out on impulse buys. Only buy something if you still really want it after you have time to think, and if you know you will want it years down the road. Also stop gifting material items so often, and encourage people to do the same for you. With these measures in place, you will not have to make hard or arbitrary decisions later. Decluttering is about getting rid of stuff, but it is also about learning to truly appreciate the items you do want to keep.